Hi! Remember me?
I know it’s been some time since my last post. In fact it’s been 4 1/2 months. A lot has happened in that time. As it relates to my weight loss journey I wish I could say it’s all been good. But sadly I cannot. In fact the news is rather bleak.
This morning I stepped on the scale for the first time in months…and let’s just say I am right back at square one.
After waiting for the digital reader on the scale to settle down, my heart sank when I saw that I was right back at my starting point. It pains me to confess that I have gained back all 71lbs. that I worked soooo hard to lose. What’s even more painful is that I am feeling the affects of the neglect I have taken my body through. I’m stiff. I’m achy. I feel heavy and burdened. I have low energy and I’m suffering from slight depression. It’s a hurtful thing to come to terms with the fact that I have to start all over again to work my way back down to a healthy weight. Honestly, if I allow myself to think too long or too hard about all the work that needs to be done I might just throw up my hands and say the heck with it.
But a quitter I am not!
Those of you who know me and those of you who have followed my journey know that quitting is not my style. This post represents day one of my journey’s reboot. With the craziness of the past few months behind me…and with the hope of relief for my back (in the form of epidural shots, one of which I had today), I see better and brighter days ahead of me.
Priority #1
I’m ready to roll up my sleeves and I’m ready to do the work. I am making the commitment to myself to make my health and well-being my number one priority! I’ve also come to terms with the fact that this leg of my journey will be quite different from before. I’m a few years older with some limitations I didn’t have when I first started out. I also have a clearer focus and that is this…I am working towards having a better quality of life as I make my way to my 50th birthday. I refuse to live the 2nd half of my life in bondage!
As I restart my engine to prepare for my journey I will stay mindful of the following:
1. Don’t Get Stuck On Shoulda Woulda Coulda
Okay, so yes I’m back at square one. And yes I should have been more vigilent with my eating and making better food choices. If only I would have kept up with my exercise regimen I would not have let things get out of control. If only I could have forseen how bad I’d feel as a result of my unhealthy eating. But you know what, the past is the past. I cannot go back and change a thing…but I can move forward and change everything. And so with that my eyes are firmly fixed on the path before me. Yes I will allow myself to learn from my past mistakes but I will not allow my past mistakes to hold me hostage and keep me from reaching my goal.
2. Start Where You Are
It never ceases to amaze me at how quickly the body adjusts to your treatment of it. It didn’t take long for my body to start feeling bad when I began to neglect it. On the flip side, it didn’t take long for my body to submit to the healthy foods and exercise when I began to treat it in a healthy manner. That being said there are some things my body cannot do…right now…and that’s okay because I know that a few weeks down the line once it’s been conditioned it will start to cooperate with me once again. The key is for me to 1) get started and 2) to do what I can for as long as I can until I can do better.
I realize I cannot start running out of the gate. I cannot even walk 3 miles the first few weeks, but with consistency I will one day soon be able to do those things again. What I can do right now is walk for 20 minutes. I can do light stretching. I can even do a few yoga and pilates moves. These are the things I absolutely can do and so that’s where I will start!
3. Go Slow
The reality of my situation is that it took more time (3 years) to regain the weight than it did to lose it. I lost 71 lbs. in a year and a half. I didn’t “diet”. I didn’t take pills, drink shakes, eat soup, or have surgery. I simply changed my eating habits, moved my body daily, took my time and had fun. I am committed to doing the same thing again. Yes, I would love to wake up tomorrow and be down 71 lbs. but that ain’t gonna happen. Besides I know the benefits of going slow and trusting the process. I’m going to do the work, focus on my actions and behaviors and allow the results to take care of themselves. Slow and steady wins the race. It will happen!
4. Focus On One Day, One Step, One Meal At A Time
The big picture is daunting. The thought of having to work at losing over 100 lbs. is paralyzing. When I think about all of the time, energy and effort I will need to expend everything in me wants to run for the hills (or maybe crawl). In the words of one of Fantasia’s songs…”it’s all too much for my mind”. Therefore I won’t allow myself to go there. I won’t allow myself to think about losing 100+ lbs. I won’t allow myself to think about exercising everyday. I won’t allow myself to stress over what to eat at each and every meal. Nope! I won’t do it! Instead I will focus on one day at a time and the goals I have for myself that day. I won’t try to go from 1 to 100 in a week and burn myself out before I get through the 2nd day. Although I will do meal planning each week I will not stress over each and every meal and beat myself up if I’m not perfect on a few. I will keep my focus narrow by taking it one day at a time, one step at a time and one meal at a time!
Your Turn To Share
What are some of the ways you reboot yourself when you’ve gone off track with your weight loss journey?